HSPs - Highly Sensitive People - do exist! Statistically about 20 per cent of the population are considered sensitive. Sensitivity is basically a neural trait, meaning the HSP has a sensitive nervous system. This means the HSP is aware of subtleties in his surroundings and stays on guard for potential "danger". For example, dark clouds or slippery pavements. The highly sensitive person is more easily overwhelmed when he has been out for too long in a highly stimulating environment, where he has been bombarded by sights and sounds and comes home with an exhausted nervous system.
Sensitivity can be both an advantage or a disadvantage. In some societies sensitivity is highly regarded. Western culture tends to 'look down' on sensitivity as a weakness and parents and teachers will spend time trying to help children "overcome" it.
The highly sensitive person often feels out of step with everyone else because they're in a minority. Being easily hurt, they can feel "affronted" when spoken to by a non-HSP in tone that an HSP would not use. The HSP therefore does not understand how others can be so direct, critical or abrasive. Usually the HSP does not confront others, but if offended will withdraw and dwell on the interaction that took place desperately trying to understand what he/she did wrong to explain why the confrontation took place.
Usually non-HSPs have no idea that they have said anything "wrong". Conflict, confrontation, and loud voices do not affect their nervous system in the same way and they have no awareness that the HSP's nervous system is now aroused and "hurting". No wonder the HSP calls non-HSPs "insensitive" or mean.
What seems ordinary to others, like loud music or crowds, can be highly stimulating to the HSP nervous system and thus stressful. A certain amount of these stimuli can initially feel good to the HSP, but when it is "too much" the stimuli become disturbing. The HSP often needs time to be alone, in order to give his nervous system time to calm down, in preparation for the onslaught of stimuli that it is going to receive again tomorrow.
In most instances a person walks into room at a party and notices simply the furniture and the people. That's about it. HSPs however, are immediately aware, whether they like it or not, of the mood, friendships and hostilities between people, and whether the air is fresh or smoky. Being an HSP means you will notice the small things. For example, threads on the rug, how the curtain is tied back, and whether the picture frame has been dusted.
As an HSP you do not necessarily judge these things but you notice nonetheless. And your nervous system becomes overwhelmed because of all these things the brain has to be aware of . This is the reason the HSP becomes easily overwhelmed in new environments and feels anxiety even though the feeling is actually an overarousal of the nervous system.
Fear should not be confused with arousal. Typically, an HSP will feel arousal by subconscious thoughts or low level events but outwardly display no obvious emotion. Increasing levels of arousing chemicals felt in the body of an HSP will cause them to feel fearful, even though intellectually there is nothing to feel fearful about. This is often referred to by HSPs as an indication of their "craziness" - when their feelings are absolutely incongruous with their awareness or thoughts.
Sensitivity can be both an advantage or a disadvantage. In some societies sensitivity is highly regarded. Western culture tends to 'look down' on sensitivity as a weakness and parents and teachers will spend time trying to help children "overcome" it.
The highly sensitive person often feels out of step with everyone else because they're in a minority. Being easily hurt, they can feel "affronted" when spoken to by a non-HSP in tone that an HSP would not use. The HSP therefore does not understand how others can be so direct, critical or abrasive. Usually the HSP does not confront others, but if offended will withdraw and dwell on the interaction that took place desperately trying to understand what he/she did wrong to explain why the confrontation took place.
Usually non-HSPs have no idea that they have said anything "wrong". Conflict, confrontation, and loud voices do not affect their nervous system in the same way and they have no awareness that the HSP's nervous system is now aroused and "hurting". No wonder the HSP calls non-HSPs "insensitive" or mean.
What seems ordinary to others, like loud music or crowds, can be highly stimulating to the HSP nervous system and thus stressful. A certain amount of these stimuli can initially feel good to the HSP, but when it is "too much" the stimuli become disturbing. The HSP often needs time to be alone, in order to give his nervous system time to calm down, in preparation for the onslaught of stimuli that it is going to receive again tomorrow.
In most instances a person walks into room at a party and notices simply the furniture and the people. That's about it. HSPs however, are immediately aware, whether they like it or not, of the mood, friendships and hostilities between people, and whether the air is fresh or smoky. Being an HSP means you will notice the small things. For example, threads on the rug, how the curtain is tied back, and whether the picture frame has been dusted.
As an HSP you do not necessarily judge these things but you notice nonetheless. And your nervous system becomes overwhelmed because of all these things the brain has to be aware of . This is the reason the HSP becomes easily overwhelmed in new environments and feels anxiety even though the feeling is actually an overarousal of the nervous system.
Fear should not be confused with arousal. Typically, an HSP will feel arousal by subconscious thoughts or low level events but outwardly display no obvious emotion. Increasing levels of arousing chemicals felt in the body of an HSP will cause them to feel fearful, even though intellectually there is nothing to feel fearful about. This is often referred to by HSPs as an indication of their "craziness" - when their feelings are absolutely incongruous with their awareness or thoughts.
About the Author:
More expert advice on dealing with nervous arousal and understanding and taking control of your emotions is available from Karen Gosling's website, which is all about surviving sensitivity.
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